The Simple Woman's Daybook ~ 12.15.09

As always, if you'd like to play along, credit goes to The Simple Woman's Daybook.

Outside my window...
typical winter dreariness. Yesterday was 60 degrees and sunny, a glorious and unexpected break from last week's cold; today just feels like winter again. Winter is my least favorite season, I'm not gonna lie...but I was reminding myself the other day that if I want the beautiful death of fall, and the hopeful new life of spring, I have to take the winter that comes with it.

I am thinking...
about my sweet friend Kelly, because an email from her just popped up. Haven't seen her in well over a year, but we have plans to meet next week and catch up. I can't wait! I'm also thinking about grain mills and blenders (researching Christmas gifts).

I am thankful for...
this morning's playdate with my friend Jamie, whom I hadn't seen since the end of October; water with lime; This American Life podcasts; afternoon naps.

From the kitchen...
dinner is in the crockpot--Sloppy Lentils from Passionate Homemaking. Last time they tasted yummy, but the lentils weren't quite soft enough and it was a soupy mess. Hoping a longer cook time will solve that problem.

Over the weekend I tried a new recipe: Smitten Kitchen's chocolate toffee cookies, which were a huge hit. I also made several familiar favorites: Paula Deen's pineapple casserole (half the sugar, more cheese); pasta fagioli from A Year of Slow Cooking (half the Tabasco, 2 cans white beans instead of white + kidney...can you tell I can't leave a recipe alone?!); and a family favorite recipe for broccoli salad.

Aaaaand, Steve made breakfast Sunday morning, as is our tradition. This week, as is often the case, was Laurie's fabulous oatmeal pancakes (with all whole wheat flour--half regular whole wheat, half white whole wheat; sucanat instead of brown sugar; and olive oil).

I am wearing...
super-comfy stretchy jeans, a white tank top, a pink v-neck sweater, a brown scarf, and my favorite tan suede sneakers.

I am creating...
tons of stuff--or at least I *plan* to be creating tons of stuff this week. A DIY gift for my little niece; a few stamped cards; that wedding gift I mentioned last month but still haven't made...

I am going...
to be very frustrated if Elijah doesn't go back to sleep. Little stinker just laid down half an hour ago and I hear him talking upstairs already. He didn't take a good nap yesterday, either...and he did NOT get enough sleep over the weekend because we were so busy and out late twice.

I am reading...
Come, Thou Long Expected Jesus by Nancy Guthrie (ed.); Counterfeit Gods by Tim Keller; When Helping Hurts by Corbett & Fikkert. I just finished Andrew Peterson's On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness last week and have borrowed the second book in the series, North! Or Be Eaten, to enjoy over Christmas break.

I am hoping...
to connect with several old friends while we are in Ohio...that friends and family will love the gifts we choose for them...that Steve's birthday gift will arrive in the mail soon...that God will continue to open my eyes and soften my heart to the beauty of His Son and help me keep my eyes fixed on eternal things amidst the busyness of the holiday season.

I am hearing...
the white noise machine coming through the monitor, and Elijah intermittently talking/humming...aaaaand he just reached over and flipped the switch that turns the monitor and noise machine off. Lovely. *off to go try and put him back down* ...well, we'll see how long that lasts.

Around the house...
it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Lame artificial tree, unfortunately, but I love the soft glow of the lights and the memories attached to various ornaments. Not only is my pre-lit garland for the mantel not working, but the 3M hooks are not sticking to keep it hung either.

One of my favorite things...
receiving Christmas cards in the mail from friends and family--especially when they have pictures for me to put on my refrigerator.

A few plans for the rest of the week...
mostly just preparing for Christmas. Our weekly playdate is tomorrow, but I may skip it since we had a playdate today and I've got so much to do this week. Prayer meeting at church tomorrow night, which I always look forward to, and lots of online shopping to finish before shipping deadlines hit.

A picture thought I am sharing...
outtake from our family photos for Christmas cards--messing around trying to get our stubborn, uncooperative toddler to smile :)

Multitude Monday, Take 142 (sort of)

Don't for a moment think that because I have missed the last two Thankful Thursdays, I am not feeling very grateful lately. Quite the opposite...my heart is full to overflowing with gratitude for the gifts, great and small, that God has been pouring out into my life the last few weeks. Since I did miss Thursday again, though, this seems a perfect opportunity to switch to Mondays for gratitude lists.

One of my favorite bloggers, Ann Voskamp, has been counting gifts for years now, and she has a whole Gratitude Community over at Holy Experience. She and the other bloggers pause to count their blessings on Mondays, and so I think I'll join them, and begin each week by remembering the gifts that come from the hand of my Father, the generous, wise and loving Giver of all good gifts. I think I'll also, like Ann, begin actually counting--and start at 101, after the mega-Thanksgiving list. (Anyone know how to edit numbered list HTML code so I don't have to manually add the numbers???)

This week, I'm especially thanking Him for...

101. our church family
102. our wonderful Christmas celebration yesterday afternoon
103. the capacity to memorize
104. Milton Vincent's Gospel Primer for Christians
105. Ann Kroeker's Mega Memory Month challenge that inspired me to memorize
Vincent's gospel narrative
106. the opportunity to share these gifts with my church family
107. causing my heart to be overcome with amazement and wonder at the glorious
gospel of grace
108. last night's Christmas program at our old church and the opportunity to see "old" friends
109. Friday's dinner and movie with fun friends
110. date night with Steve and some friends on Saturday
111. the sweet girls who watched Elijah for us and were a delight to have in our home overnight Saturday/Sunday
112. 60-degree sunshine today, perfect for a walk and an hour at the playground
113. the thrill of the mailbox this time of year
114. cheap organic apples
115. not one but TWO fun playdates last week
116. girl time shopping with a friend last Thursday
117. cinnamon dolce latte
118. experiencing so much mercy and grace from Christ that I can hardly begin to recount it all

Friends, I have so much to praise God for--His temporary gifts, and above all these, His Son, given as the ultimate Gift to reconcile us to Himself. Join me and the rest of the Gratitude Community in remembering and counting?

Testifying that Christ is All

Matt Chandler, lead pastor of The Village Church in Dallas, is one of my favorite preachers to listen to via podcast. So, like countless others, I was shocked and concerned to hear last week that he had a seizure on Thanksgiving Day and doctors discovered a brain tumor.

He had surgery on Friday and seems to be recovering well, praise God. But what really amazes me is his reaction to this turn of events. From the blog post he wrote before the surgery, to the video that was shown at his church yesterday, to his and his wife's Twitter updates, it has been beautiful and inspiring to see this couple (and their church) making much of Christ, even in the midst of unimaginably frightening circumstances.

It would be well worth your time to read and watch this husband, father, and man of God testifying, *before* knowing the outcome of his surgery, that Christ is the greatest treasure of his life:

• My Heart is Full...I Am Thankful (written the morning of the surgery)
• video message from Matt (recorded before the surgery and shown at the church over the weekend)

NaBloPoMo Wrap-Up December Update

Where exactly did November go, anyway? It's beyond cliche to say that time flies these last two months of every year...but seriously, I was just gathering ideas for NaBloPoMo, and then I turned around and it was over and I hadn't even gotten around to 75% of them. OY.

The Christmas season feels especially zooey because of how our vacation time is falling this year. We have just three weeks between our Thanksgiving trip home and Steve's Christmas break from work--so once you cram shopping, Christmas parties, Christmas programs, and a wedding in there (never mind the usual playdates and whatnot)...well, let's just say I am not quite sure how NOT to neglect this blog. I'll do my best...and if nothing else, I'll start chipping away at that list of ideas in January.

In the Midst of the Mess

I guess "delusional" is about the only word for it.

During the long car ride back from Ohio last night, my mind began filling with lists: people to email, tasks to complete, projects to start, gifts to purchase. I grabbed a pen and filled half a sheet of paper with scribbled reminders, a few urgent items starred.

Bright and early this morning, I dove in, selecting only the most time-sensitive and immediately necessary items to copy onto a to-do list for today. And then my toddler woke up, and we both faced the Monday Morning Reality Check: After five days of doting grandparents, plus Daddy being around, I was now the only source of attention for Elijah.

Neither of us dealt with it well.

Elijah whined. I snapped and seethed, impatient, irritable, resentful. I cried out for help, and snapped again, my morning an endless cycle of frustration, repentance, and repeated ugliness. I wished I could go to bed and start the whole day over again.

I stopped and confessed: Father, I am having such a hard time dying to self today.

I remembered my own words: Elijah is not an interruption to my agenda...he is my priority.

I thanked God that Jesus didn't pursue His own agenda, but instead prayed, "Not my will but YOURS be done."

And during a brief phone call, I listened to a friend say, "On days like today, I just have to accept that I'm not going to get anything else done. I have to love on my kids and let the rest go."

While Elijah napped, I ate leftover smoked turkey and apple-spinach salad and pored over wise words of grace and peace from Ann.

When he woke up, still slightly grumpy and begging for "Leleplh" (his cousin, Olivia--"Leleplh" is my terrible attempt to spell how he pronounces "Livi"--he loves to watch the videos my sister-in-law has posted online), I sat here with him on my lap, trying to breathe slow and deep, letting go of the to-do list, thanking God for our widescreen monitor as I browsed in another window while clicking through all 68 video clips (most are less than 30 seconds).

I scrapped my plans to package homemade cookies and take them to the post office this afternoon. I sat in the middle of the kitchen floor and read library books. I turned on "bebec" (music), and changed the song when it was apparently the WRONG bebec, and swayed and sang to my little grump.

Then I thought of a conversation I had with a friend recently. She shared how her husband is (wisely) wary of blogging because of the way we women put our best foot forward, sharing the polished versions of our lives. "Why don't you ever post pictures of the house when it's messy?" he challenged her.

I also thought of Ann Voskamp's ability to see beauty in the most mundane things. And so I grabbed my camera and documented a failure of a day. In this season when we all post warm, inviting pictures of our homes decorated beautifully for Christmas, I am inviting you to come tour my disaster.

Don't get me wrong, I think those holiday photos are fun--a friend of mine posted hers just this morning, and I loved the virtual tour of her beautiful home! But here at the Kannel house, in between Thanksgiving recovery and the trimming of the Christmas tree (which is currently still in the basement), we're just going to be real for a moment. Let me help you feel better about your mess.

Step in the back door and see three bags that need to be unpacked, library books strewn across the [ugly and in need of replacement] kitchen floor. The kitchen mess would be far more overwhelming if I used my wide-angle lens--but I was too lazy to change it.

Cookies I have never screwed up before, which I planned to bake and send to a friend this week: first batch completely flat (that has seriously never happened before, I have no idea why) and mangled coming off the sheet; second batch burned:

Cookie-baking dishes filling the sink:

Suitcases in the dining room, needing to be unpacked, laundry needing to be started:

Five days' worth of mail, meal planning paraphernalia, and other paper-clutter covering the dining room table...we'll have to clear a spot to eat...

Blocks scattered across the living room floor--meant to be cleaned up before we left last Tuesday, and forgotten in the rush to get on the road:

The long to-do list I foolishly expected to accomplish today (notice NOTHING is crossed off...you have no idea how twitchy that makes my type-A, anal-retentive self):

...And the basket-case-yet-still-adorable two-year-old who had other plans (and desperately misses Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Duh, Grammy, Pops, Uncle Josh and Chief):

(I'm not being totally heartless by snapping this picture, by the way...there was no immediate crisis. Here he is upset because he doesn't like the song that's playing and wants a different one. EVERYTHING was just that big a deal today.)

So now that whiny mess of a toddler is sleeping again (apparently needing to catch up after our trip), and instead of tackling my list, I'm taking the time to blog. Perhaps not the best use of my time--or perhaps (I hope) it will encourage someone today.

Heaven forbid any of you ever come away from this blog with a polished, shiny picture of me. I am real. I am oh so flawed. And this is what my house looks like on a Monday after a weekend away. But I serve a God who makes the ugly beautiful...who brings order from chaos...who loves me even when I am a grumpy mess...and who has drawn my boundary lines in pleasant places, given me a beautiful inheritance--if only I will open my eyes to see it.

Born to Be a Buckeye

Like any good Buckeye fans, we are proudly brainwashing our son :) Elijah has been watching Ohio State football since he was only a few weeks old:

And at five months, he proudly sported scarlet and gray:

This fall, we haven't been able to watch the games, but Elijah still knows who to root for. It would have been better to post this last weekend in honor of the big game against Michigan, but we wanted to wait until family members could see this shirt in person--especially Pops (who, as a Michigan fan, would hate it), and Uncle Duh (who, as an Ohio State fan, would love it).

First an action shot:

And then a better look at what the shirt says:

He's even wearing socks that say "Born to be a Buckeye" :)

Surfin' Saturday: Vitacost and Little Moon

I have two completely unrelated websites to share today, one utterly practical and the other just plain fun.

My first discovery is an online store called Vitacost. I ordered from them several weeks ago, and though I felt overwhelmed by the selection, I was thrilled with the prices and the service. This is now my go-to place for buying vitamins for our family. It's got much better quality vitamins than I can find at Target or Kroger, and at wholesale prices! It's also (as far as I can tell) the best price on the web for Nutiva extra-virgin coconut oil.

The more I look around, the more I am suprised to discover how many items they carry. Recently I found low prices on Dr. Bronner's soap and Bac-Out there, and I believe they carry many mainstream health and beauty items--the same things you'd find at your local store, only probably cheaper, and tax free. Shipping is flat-rate (only $4.99), and I was able to find a coupon code that made my shipping free (check RetailMeNot.com). I plan to do more and more of my health-related shopping at Vitacost--from nutritional supplements to specialty food items to cleaners to cosmetics.

Totally changing the subject...one of my favorite just-for-fun blogs is a photography blog called Little Moon. Amber Scruggs is a Virginia-based child and family photographer who specializes in natural light portraits. All her work is gorgeous, but the newborn shoots she does are absolutely breathtaking! Much as I would love it, I could never afford to have someone like her take photos of my family--so I just drool over her photos, and learn from her too (she does really helpful FAQ posts every now and then about her techniques, equipment, etc).


Related:
Surfin' Saturday: Shop 'Til You Drop
Surfin' Saturday: Coupon Codes

Relationships Come First

When I was in college, one of my dearest friends taught me a philosophy that has served me well ever since: "Relationships come first." Pam said it early and often in our friendship, and I never forgot those three simple words--in fact, I passed them along to countless other college friends long after Pam had graduated.

My schedule at college was packed--a full class load, a part-time job, leadership in the chorale, ministry team membership. But when I had to decide between writing a paper or having coffee and a deep conversation with a friend, the friend won every time. I'm not advocating irresponsibility; it's not that I was blowing off studying in order to watch a movie or play euchre with friends. Rather, I chose to prioritize meaningful investment in relationships--typically long talks over dinner or coffee--even if it meant staying up later to complete an assignment. If a friend needed me, it didn't matter if I had a test the next morning; I was going to put the relationship first.

Pam modeled it for me right from the start. She was at least as busy as I ever was, yet when I, a timid, lonely freshman, asked her to "sort of mentor me" during her junior year, she made time for me. Wednesday night dinner with Pam was a given on my calendar every week for the next three years, I think.

As she wisely pointed out, "In five years, what are you going to remember? The test material, or the friend you spent quality time with?" And you know what? She was right. I'm endlessly thankful for all I learned in the classroom during my four years of college, and there are a lot of things I'd do differently in terms of academics, to be sure. But I have never once regretted putting relationships first. What made the biggest, most lasting impact on me was not the ideas I pondered or the papers I wrote, but the people I learned to know and love.

These days, I may not have assignments or deadlines, but it's still all too easy to be task-oriented instead of people-oriented. Many days I find myself more concerned with crossing items off my to-do list than with caring for my son. So as I reflect on my college years, I want to remind myself: Relationships come first. The most important relationships in my life are Steve and Elijah--and they must be a bigger priority in my mind, heart and day-planner than any of the tasks I need to complete.

"...it's easy to lose sight of what ministry is really about. ...We get our minds too focused on tasks, when ministry is ultimately about people. I just want to constantly remind myself that people aren't an interruption to my work. They are my work."
--Plan A...And There's No Plan B, Dwight Robertson and Mark Vermilion

Ultimate Thankful Thursday: 2009 Edition

Four years ago, my dear friend Kelly inspired me to do a mega-thankful list for Thanksgiving: 100 things I'm thankful for. It's good to pile blessings on top of blessings and realize just how many reasons for gratitude I have, both big and small. A list of a hundred barely makes a dent in the pile.

Today, as every Thursday, my thanks are not generic. Every good gift I have comes from the hand of my Heavenly Father--and He Himself is the gift that surpasses all others. I'm feeling especially convicted this time around to focus on and treasure the Giver, not just the temporary earthly blessings He bestows. This year I am thanking God for countless gifts, including...

1. His absolute sovereignty
2. photographs that enable me to see places I'll never get to visit
3. photographs that enable me to remember people and places I have known and loved
4. freedom of speech
5. working all things together for my good and His glory
6. used book stores and sales
7. hot showers
8. Operation Christmas Child
9. real mail
10. His perfect goodness
11. giraffes
12. elephants
13. lions
14. dogs
15. providing everything I need for life and godliness
16. lessons taught well by others who have gone before me
17. lessons learned the hard way
18. Google
19. sleeping through the night
20. His steadfast love
21. A Gospel Primer for Christians
22. the mental capacity to memorize the gospel narratives in the book
23. my parents' and my in-laws' wisdom with money
24. the CCEF class I got to take this fall
25. interceding for me
26. friends who pray for me
27. friends who share their heart so I can pray for them
28. the holdout trees in our neighborhood--just a few who are still surprising me with their beauty
29. our jogging stroller, so nice for long daily walks
30. His unsearchable wisdom
31. cookbooks
32. recipe blogs
33. a husband who will eat almost anything
34. the realization that foods eaten closer to the way He created them have got to be better for us than foods man has screwed around with
35. giving me a beautiful inheritance
36. friends from my childhood
37. friends from high school
38. friends from college
39. new friends
40. friends my age
41. older and wiser friends
42. younger friends, who teach me as much as I teach them
43. friends I've never met in real life
44. Jesus, what a friend for sinners!
45. not treating me as my sins deserve
46. our new church
47. our pastor's gospel-saturated preaching
48. other pastors' gospel-centered preaching available free online
49. cough drops
50. His awesome power
51. page protectors
52. coconut oil
53. podcasts
54. the smell of freshly ground vanilla coffee
55. completing the good work He began in me
56. sloppy kisses from Elijah
57. tender kisses from Steve
58. the ability to read
59. protection from ten thousand horrors I have never known and cannot imagine
60. His coexisting justice and mercy
61. hardwood floors
62. home printers
63. indoor lighting
64. Christmas trees
65. never leaving or forsaking me
66. the gift of marriage
67. the privilege of motherhood
68. not just marriage generically, but the incredible man I am married to
69. not just motherhood generically, but the adorable son I birthed
70. the fact that He never changes
71. the parents who gave me life and raised me with love
72. the in-laws who have welcomed me into their family
73. the miracle of adoption
74. the ability to write
75. keeping me from stumbling and falling away
76. blue skies
77. necessary rain
78. warm fires
79. acoustic guitars
80. His absolute holiness and purity
81. vocal music
82. the ability to hear
83. metaphors
84. del.icio.us
85. not breaking me when I am bruised or snuffing me out when I am only smoldering
86. pumpkin
87. clean drinking water
88. the outlet that this blog has been for me
89. the other blogs that challenge, encourage, inform and inspire me
90. His patient gentleness
91. the unfathomable suffering He endured at the cross
92. defeating death and sin once and for all
93. meeting me right where I am
94. loving me too much to leave me there
95. preparing for me an eternal inheritance that far outweighs any good or bad on earth
96. breathing life into my soul when I was still dead in sin
97. replacing my heart of stone with a heart of flesh
98. the ability to see Him as beautiful and glorious
99. the capacity to enjoy Him as the most valuable treasure in all the universe
100. the hope of everlasting life with Him

Related:
Thanksgiving 2008
Thanksgiving 2007
Thanksgiving 2006
Thanksgiving 2005

WFMW: That Tube Goes Further Than You Think

I can't remember now who suggested this to me--but I'm so glad they did. Maybe this is obvious to most people, but it was brilliant to me. It is one of the easiest, most effortless ways I know to be frugal, and all you need is a pair of scissors and a ziploc bag.

You know those tubes of liquidy beauty items that stand on end--lotions and so forth? You figure that since they're standing on end, the lotion has settled at the cap and you're able to get most of it out. But there comes a point where you just can't squeeze hard enough, and you have to throw the tube away.

No more. You will be astonished to discover how much lotion or makeup is still in that tube! And getting it out this way is much easier than wrestling with the tube to squeeze out the last drops. I first did this with a tube of body cream from Bath & Body Works. I simply cut the very top off of the tube with a pair of scissors, and used my fingers to wipe out the lotion that was stuck to the inside of the tube. When I got all the lotion from the upper part of the tube, I cut it off further down so I could use up the rest. And I stored the cut tube in a plastic baggie in between uses to keep it from drying out.

Recently, I thought I was about out of foundation--but figured I would cut the top off and maybe get another day or two worth of makeup out. Wrong: I continued to use that tube for several WEEKS! It was a smaller tube, so I used a cotton swab to get the remaining foundation out.

The next time you think you're just about out of lotion or foundation or something similar, cut off the top of the tube. It works for me!

*I am out of the loop and, not being a regular participant, didn't realize that WFMW would be on vacation this week--oops! Next week, you can visit We Are THAT Family for more Works for Me Wednesday tips.*

Related:
WFMW: Bleaching in the Sun
WFMW: Photo Postcard Thank-Yous
WFMW: Christmas Card Prayers

Why "Lavender *Sparkles*"?

I'm sort of surprised the question doesn't come up more. Lavender *Sparkles* is, after all, an unusual name for a blog. And this blog doesn't seem to have anything to do with lavender OR sparkles...in fact the layout isn't even purple, let alone sparkly. I'm like the blog version of Grape-Nuts.

But Zoanna asked a couple of weeks ago where my blog title came from. So here's the explanation (or lack thereof). I hate to disappoint you, but there's no real, logical reason for this crazy title. I'm absolutely terrible at titling, always have been. My favorite writing professor in college once drew a sad face next to a particularly terrible essay title. Truly.

When I started this blog, way back in November 2003, I wanted a unique title. No offense to anyone in particular...but I didn't want to call my blog "Random Musings" or any variation of that, even though that was the first, natural thing that came to mind. It seemed lame, and I wanted to be a little more original.

Lavender *Sparkles* was sort of a trademark/joke of mine back in the summer of 2002, when I was traveling from youth camp to camp on an IWU ministry team. Somewhere along the way--I can't remember now who got me started doing this--I began using a crazy lisp for fun (think "Sid the Sloth," if you've ever seen Ice Age). Just college students being silly.

Anyway, at one camp, everyone was divided into "family groups," and the groups were labeled by color. Their name tags hung on colored ribbons. All but one of them were the typical colors: blue, red, green, orange, etc. And then there was a sparkly light purple. For reasons I can't even explain, we all got a big kick out of saying, "Lavender SPARKLES!" in that silly lisp voice.

So I don't know if I had recently looked at my camp scrapbook back in November 2003, or what was going through my head. But somehow I had the flash of stupidity inspiration that instead of "Random Musings and Thoughts by Amy" I could call my blog "Lavender *Sparkles*". It's an improvement, right? Right?

I've thought about changing it many, many times since then...but I just can't come up with anything better. The best I've been able to do is come up with an ever-so-slightly related tag line ("shine like a star"...sparkles...get it?...ok, never mind).

I so admire the creative, meaningful blog titles others invent. There are the phrases from quotes or song lyrics (Chatting at the Sky), the clever people who play on their name (The Mental Ward), the people who are good at interesting turns of phrase (Just Another Pretty Farce). Then there are a few blogs who have ordinary titles, but their content is so good, you don't care--or the title is intentionally tongue-in-cheek, or deeper than it appears at first glance (Amy's Humble Musings, ordinary mother).

And then there's me. Pretty much the only thing I've got going for me is "unique." So although I feel a little sheepish and ridiculous about it, until inspiration strikes, Lavender *Sparkles* it is. In the meantime, I am absolutely open to brilliant suggestions.


[photo: from my summer 2002 scrapbook, me with the camper, Audra, who bought me a Lavender Sparkles pen she found at a gift shop--and a sampling of that infamous ribbon]

Reminders of Promises

Elijah doesn't trust me. Or he has really terrible short-term memory. Or something. I'm not well-versed in all the details of child development; all I know is, he doesn't yet understand that I'll do what I say I'm going to do.

Often I'll tell him we're going to do something--take a walk, say, or read some books--something he really, really enjoys. I try not to mention it until I'm actually ready to do it, but that doesn't always work: I'll get him dressed and get shoes on, but realize I need to hit the bathroom before we go. We'll sit down in the reading chair, and I'll immediately catch a whiff of poopy diaper.

Apparently, in his two-year-old mind, not doing it RIGHT NOW means we're not going to do it, ever again in his lifetime. So when I get back up out of the reading chair and carry him to the changing table instead of selecting a favorite book...well, you can imagine this makes for a very upset toddler.

When I see the agitated, anxious look on Elijah's face, and he begins to whine, I find myself repeating, over and over, my promise that we're going to do what I said we would do. If you'd been in my house this morning, when the reading/poopy diaper scenario ensued, you would have heard something like this:

"We're going to read, I promise. Mama just has to take care of your poopy diaper and wash her hands, and then we'll read. I promise we're going to read. We're going to read, in just a minute. I just have to wash my hands and then we'll read. We really are going to read. I promise, I will read to you!"

My thought is that this endless repetition will calm him enough to avoid a meltdown in the sixty seconds it takes me to finish the task and get back to the reading chair. (I do think it helps a little...if nothing else it makes me laugh instead of getting frustrated.) I'm reminding Elijah that I haven't forgotten my promise, that my word means something, that I really will do what I said I would do--even if it looks for a brief moment like I'm reneging. I'm human, so I know I'll screw up sometimes, but my hope is that my son will learn as he grows that Mama can be trusted--that she keeps her promises, that she is a woman of her word.

It occurred to me this afternoon that I know someone else who keeps promises, who really will do what He says He will do. And I know someone else who tends to freak out when it looks like He has forgotten her.

But I have an endless supply of great and glorious promises at my disposal. I know that even if I sometimes (be it deliberately or inadvertently) break my promises, God never, ever breaks His. I'm thankful that instead of getting angry with me when I fail to trust Him and instead get agitated and upset, He patiently reminds me of His promises. His Word is full of them--and perhaps I need to repeat them to myself over and over, until my soul calms down and I rest in the confidence that my Father can be trusted--that He keeps His promises, that His Word is true.

Stubborn Grace

"Human sin is stubborn, but not as stubborn as the grace of God and not half so persistent, not half so ready to suffer to win its way."

--Cornelius Plantinga, Not the Way It's Supposed to Be
(quoted at Of First Importance)

Fabulous Customer Service, Part 2

This must be my week for getting wonderful, unexpected treatment from retail stores! This afternoon I went to Whole Foods to look for a few unusual ingredients I knew I wouldn't find at Kroger. I just finally made it to Whole Foods for the first time a month or two ago, and oh, is that a grocery shopping experience. I so wish the closest one wasn't a 50-minute drive away...though maybe it's best for my grocery budget that it is!

Anyway, it was just a quick trip (especially because Elijah is SO not into grocery shopping at the moment), but I had several things I wanted to accomplish. I was hoping to get a good deal on organic apples to make applesauce and apple chips, and I wanted to pick up more Kerrygold butter. I also had Steve with me, for his first trip to Whole Foods, because we have a friend from church who is a cheese buyer there and Steve loves cheese :)

Why am I telling you all these details? I have no idea. You're used to it by now, I suppose. Most importantly, I had a few ingredients I needed for some baking experiments I plan to conduct this weekend (I'll explain more soon, if it goes well). I asked the first person I saw where I might find these, and he said that while the first two were across the street at Whole Foods Body, he would search for the coconut flour I wanted.

A few minutes later, he came back with a little bag of the flour. "This is the only kind we have," he said, and paused. "Have you ever used coconut flour before?" I said I hadn't, and he continued, "because it's $7 for this little bag." I smiled and said that didn't surprise me, since I had priced it online. But he proceeded to cross out the barcode with a pen and say, "I'm going to give you this bag for free, so you can try it out and see if you like it."

What?!? I totally was not expecting that kind of generosity! So I walked out of Whole Foods with a free bag of coconut flour, nine pounds of inexpensive, organic Cameo apples, a few pounds of high-quality grassfed butter, and all the ingredients for my kitchen experiment...and lots of goodwill toward/desire to shop at Whole Foods again. Yay for above-and-beyond customer service!

Thankful Thursday, Take 141

Thanking God this week for...

• the funny, surprising phrases Elijah says
• opportunities to be outside in fresh air and sunshine
• crockpots
• opportunities to help women in need
• the way Elijah fills in words in books and songs
• my favorite Christmas CD (couldn't wait any longer to break it out...this one would be well-worth listening to year-round, but it's a special treat to save it for the holidays!)
• singing in the car with Steve
• the opportunity to hear an online friend's lovely voice this morning
• successful new recipes this week: grilled brined turkey breast (makes you NEVER want to go back to the oven-roasted kind!) and turkey panzanella (great way to use the leftovers)
• this month's Desiring God CD: one of Piper's advent poems!
• Tim Keller's brilliant, mind-blowing gospel insights
• Redeemer Presbyterian Church's generosity in putting many of his sermons online for free recently--including a wonderful one called "Work and Rest," which I listened to today
• knowing the worst about me and loving me anyway